A Date with Innocence Motivation in Human Design
Human Design Reflections and Happy Birthday to the Sun God.
Quick Story Time:
I once had a date tell me that I was so kind and open that it felt manipulative.
I told her she misread my innocence.
But I’ll return to the story later. First, let’s look at Luffy.
Content Disclaimer
“The journey for innocence motivation is to understand that you are not here to get in the weeds of things.”
When I first heard about One Piece, a Japanese animated pirate fantasy, or at least when it came into my consciousness from the cultural zeitgeist, I was not in the spiritual or creative state of mind to receive it as the epic story it would eventually become. How could I? It’s a manga about pirates, and the symbol is a skull and crossbones that started when I was 7 years old, and the anime began two years later in 1999. I shoved Luffy to the periphery of my psyche because the boys around me loved him, and by the time I became an anime fan, the boys were not nice to me.
When I shove something to the recesses of my mind, it always returns to me when Sophie believes I need it most.
However, had I known that reading and watching One Piece would involve deep shadow and inner child work, I would’ve been a stan from childhood. I probably would have been a more confident child and person if I had grown up with this character as a personal motivator. I wouldn’t have felt so confused by people misunderstanding my innocence as arrogance.
But all things happen for the good
of those who abide in
The Innocent Spirit.
Now, as an adult who knows they are neurodivergent and who has experienced several traumas in multiple areas of life, from familial to friendship to queerplatonic and romantic and sensual relationships, I am glad I formally met Luffy in my twenties. By then, I was pretty sure of the hells I’d endured and was ready to heal through those soul wounds and scars left behind; but had completely forgotten that I was autistic and the ADHD had grown comfortably fatigued from overcompensating for decades to fit the sun into a seed, and the autistic mask had been glued on for so long that it all felt like my own skin. I wasn’t faking it; I was trying to feel authentic and in integrity with myself.
Projecting as in a One Piece Mirror
I wanted to feel beautiful inside and out, and comfortable in my skin. I wanted to share my mind and soul without being misinterpreted. I wanted to feel seen and not simply be perceived as someone I wasn’t, someone the insecurities of others around me were projecting onto me. Isn’t that ironic, as a Projector in Human Design?
Then, a beloved coworker at the time and I got to talking about One Piece. At the time, the anime’s episode count was in the mid-700s. I could not even fathom devoting that much time and energy to over seven hundred episodes of any visual program, and I’m not the type of person who can be recommended things to and be expected to hop on immediately—no, my ADHD needs my agency to choose when the time is right. So, I said I’d try, but I wasn’t racing to the finish line.
Still, this friend always recommended good shit, and I got tired of Luffy giggling with my Sophie in the corner of my mind thanks to social media. The closer I looked at Luffy and my Spirit interact through lore and, looking a little too alike not to pique my interest, the more it felt like I needed a slow-burning anime to cozy up to while I crashed from heartbreak, workplace harassment, and friendship mounting drama. There was a resonance in the joyful, childlike innocence of the character’s personality and his “When am I never ready?” fierce fighting spirit that sparked a smoldering ember within me. Then something clicked.
Luffy reawakened my slumbering Inner Child, the little divinity tucked safely and buried deep under my autistic mask.
I asked myself, why Luffy—the Fool, of all archetypes and symbols in the Spirit of the Depths—would so profoundly resonate with me. Ultimately, I realized Luffy has one life goal that he’s too stubborn a Taurus bull to quit on, and he makes friendship and building community look easy.
Why?
Because Monkey D. Luffy does what the fuck he wants.
His entire life (the entire series run), Luffy has maintained his childlike sense of awe and wonder, play, and reckless, boundless adventure while also fighting against very real and dangerously oppressive material and political people and forces. We also have the physical features of autistic youthfulness, the perpetual baby face that makes people think we’re younger than we are (I call it Autistic Agelessness), but act older than we are… most of the time.
“Leading by your own example and finding what feels most authentic and aligned for you is your primary motivation in life.”
My vision of myself was blurred by other people’s oily, envious fingers, and I could no longer be their mirror. Instead, I needed a mirror of who I am to myself. And so yeah, I found it in a carefree and ungovernable seventeen-year-old auDHD Brazilian pirate MC with a cracked-out life dream that he’s absolutely going to achieve.
By the time I pressed play on “I'm Luffy! The Man Who Will Become the Pirate King!” and started the Roman Dawn Arc, unbeknownst to me, I was starting the longest season of autistic burnout I’ve ever experienced. The anxiety was lobbing fast balls, and the depression was swinging a home run. I was retreating more, internalizing my stress because I did not feel I had anyone around me who made me feel psychologically safe to talk about what I was silently suffering through.
Reflecting on the beginning of my One Piece, I was in the throes of spiritual warfare, and it was coming from every side—social, emotional, financial, and psychological. My mind and body could no longer contain my soul’s anguish. So, I started to bleed out. In my prayers, I always asked for comfort, for peace of mind, if not in my life.
“While you may learn and develop many tools and systems that allow you to help others, your message is more universal than personal. “
Innocence is such a loaded word.
Innocence Motivation is pure energy. It has no intrinsic motivation and no agenda. It is not here to set a specific outcome in motion but to guide people along the way to their own outcomes, to be there in the process, and to trust all else's intuitive timing.
I can be kind and generous to others because I am confident in myself. I love myself and trust my intuition, first and foremost, to guide me into my most authentic way of life. Innocence Motivation is an energy that reminds me that I should trust myself more when making decisions. My path for my life will lead to better without forcing anything, and I should not worry about being misunderstood because people always will.
So when that woman told me that being kind to her and speaking thoughtfully but without an agenda felt manipulative because it made her like me more, I wondered who had hurt her so much that she misinterpreted my respect for her by answering all her questions with love and honesty as a trick to make her fall for me.1
The true strength and power of having no intrinsic motivation is not being in control, and therefore in charge, of any individual person, but instead being influential. She received treatment she wasn’t used to, which influenced her perception of me, to reframe her understanding of generosity, but she (messed up with me when she) questioned my motives.
Like Luffy, who is auDHD and sexually coded, whenever someone catches feelings for him based on his kind character, I was confused by this. In a calm air of autistic-asexual detachment, I told her there was nothing complicated about her to manipulate; I was being a kind date. AuDHD-asexuals are not wont to read sharing interests and positive emotions as inherently flirting, being suggestive, or leading someone on, because we’re innocently trying to make friends and share through infodumping our special interests. So for her to read into my actions like that made me want to make myself abundantly clear.
My best friends told me that was harsh, but oh well. Because now you’ve insulted me and mistaken my innocence for wickedness, and you don’t believe yourself worthy of my kindness and generosity. I don’t like that because I only want you to enjoy yourself and be treated well while in my company.
Now that I know that I’m better off surveying life and engaging from the balcony instead of the dance floor, I would rather pull back from people who misunderstand that to be anything other than preserving my innocence to enjoy life as an embodied, somaesthetic experience. My only motive, my only agenda, is to make your inner child smile.
5/5/25 means…
Happy Birthday to My Short Mugiwara King!
Today is Luffy’s birthday, and it’s also Children’s Day in Japan! Happy birthday to my Taurean, short pirate king! I thank the Holy Spirit every day for introducing me to you. If you don’t embody the somaesthetic experience of love, joy, and fighting for freedom, I don’t know who does.
Thanks to you, I’ve learned, unlearned, and remembered much about reframing the rubber bounce of resilience as strength and power without losing sight of the soul, the sunny, bright light of your inner child. So, cheers to another year of delicious meat, friends-turned-found family, and political liberation!
ILYMDL.
“With an Innocence Motivation, your goal is not to direct others but to honestly share what you see with a dose of innocence and love.
Focus on being your own role model and embody the qualities and actions that feel most aligned.”